Movin’ to West Virginia
(DJ asleep wrapped in the West Virginia flag we bought online. By the way, Skip, you’ll be happy to know that the flag is made in China.)
Well, we’re not moving there for probably 10 or 15 more years. But DJ and I have put a lot of thought into trying to retire a little early, and do it somewhere else. Somewhere in the US that we could have some land, not have close neighbors, and pretty much be left the fuck alone. (Including being able to target practice off the back porch.)
We picked West Virginia by the process of elimination. Here’s what we were looking for: No earthquakes. (Eliminates the West Coast.) No hurricanes or floods. (Eliminates much of the South East, and much of Texas.) No tornadoes. (Eliminates everything from Texas up to North Dakota.) Not hot as fuck (eliminates much of the South and Southwest.) Lots of leafy shade trees (Eliminates much of the Southwest.) Not a lot of snow. (Eliminates the north and upper east coast, including New York and New England.) Plus we want cheap land, low property taxes, and want a state with Castle Doctrine and easier-to-get pistol carry permits (Take a close look at the photo above. The flag even has two guns in the design! And dig the state motto. It means “Mountaineers are always free.”)
That whole list of our “demands” pretty much only leaves West Virginia. Plus, West Virginia has a low crime rate, it’s number 43 out of 50 lowest crime per capita in the USA.
Beautiful land is cheap in West Virginia. The price of a house with no land in our town in California (let’s say 300,000 bucks) will buy you a lot in WV.
Here’s an 85-acre farm and a cute house for $300,000:
In West Virginia, for $289,000 you can buy this 100-acre farm with a really pretty house:
If you wanna go a little more low-rent than that, here’s a house and 8 acres for $84,900:
Yay! We’re looking forward to doing this. (Let’s hope my new YouTube book does really really well!)
September 25th, 2008 at 3:28 am
So green, ..Better get a good lawnmower! (*:
September 25th, 2008 at 3:31 am
>So green, ..Better get a good lawnmower! (*:
More likely a goat!
I was actually thinking if we do this, I might build a small shed-like house or two, about a football field away from our house, and have a couple cool younger doods live there. Maybe start the “Michael Dean Writer’s Fellowship.” Aspiring writers can write an essay to win the chance to get to live on our land for a year, do 20 hours of yard work and errands (drive into town for food!) in exchange for room and slop. And every Sunday night, I’ll spend a few hours meeting with them and offering encouragement and mentoring on their writing (or filmmaking or whatever.)
September 25th, 2008 at 3:47 am
Love those potential properties, that is cheap for what you’re receiving.
September 25th, 2008 at 5:08 pm
My brother moved to West Virginia from Ohio and loves it dearly.
One downside is the lack of MINERAL RIGHTS.
Therefore, some cold Tuesday, the owner of the mineral rights can come in and push the top off of your mountain to get the coal.
Check on it.
Other than that, he likes it really well.
Lows around zero F. but only a few days a year.
And no mosquitoes - per brother.
And, poor cell phone reception, which could be a bonus.
See you at the range.
Phil
September 26th, 2008 at 12:06 am
WOW! That’s horrible.
And I’d never heard of it.
Well, me and the wife might have to look for a different “promised land” for our retirement. Thanks for the heads-up, Phil. Glad to find this out now rather than after it’s too late.
Basically, the issue is this: not ALL land in WV has sold its mineral rights, but many have, often over 100 years ago. And it’s really difficult for citizens to be able to pay to do the research to find out if the rights on a particular parcel have been leased. Often they’ve been leased to more than one company, or one right (like coal) has been leased to one company, and another right (natural gas and/or oil) has been leased to someone else.) Oil/coal/natural gas companies have the money to do this research. And when the rights that someone owns on your land get sold at auction, the companies often show up and outbid ever private citizen.
Yuck.
Here’s more info on WV mineral rights, from a grass-roots organization that fights to help get rights back for private land owners, The West Virginia Surface Owner’s Rights Organization:
http://www.wvsoro.org/